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The “Age Appropriate” Measuring Stick For Expectations is Broken

Many parent-child struggles are manifested by requests and expectations that are not “age appropriate.” It’s one of the first recommendations parenting “gurus” and “experts” recommend assessing when you’re sailing in troubled waters. While it’s a good concept (better than the normal alternative of expecting too much, too soon), it leaves A LOT to be desired.…

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The Viral Popularity of Child Abuse

A grandmother pulls a knife on her grandson in the car. A mom rages at her pre-teen son over his grades and forces him to come get hit even as he prays to God for safety. A mom writes a lengthy post on Facebook of her dumping her kids’ ice cream in the garbage because they…

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Why Parenting May Not Matter (A Casual Rebuttal)

An article published on the 1st of December titled, Why Parenting May Not Matter and Why Most Social Science Research is Probably Wrong, is making it’s way across the interwebs in viral fashion. I saw the article the day after it was published and had a lot of issues with it. But when it showed up in…

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Your Child’s Bad Behavior Won’t Stop Until You Make This One Change

Too many parents believe that children, at the core, are not interested in doing what’s “right.” That children who don’t want to share are “selfish brats.” That children who say what they think without a filter are “rude” or “impolite.” When a child is upset, throwing tantrums, or pushing buttons, the child is “giving me a…

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Your Children Don’t Need “Positive Reinforcement”

Is “positive reinforcement” the most popular parenting and schooling phrase? I don’t have any hard statistics, but if I were to bet money I’d split my bet between “obedience” and “positive reinforcement.” The question typically starts out like this: “How can I get my child to ‘X?'” Then comes the famous answer, “Do ‘Y,’ he…

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Kids Don’t Need or Want Your Praise

There’s a lot of controversy surrounding the idea of not praising children. Alfie Kohn, an author on education, human behavior, and parenting has argued that, “Rewards and punishment are two sides of the same coin.” He’s talking about the coin of coercion and manipulation. Carrots and sticks. And praise falls squarely into the reward category. Kohn uses the…

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Have You Taught Your Children “The Four Agreements?”

To be a revolutionary parent, you must understand that your children are a blank slate. They have an equal capacity to be good and bad. Moral and immoral. Productive and destructive. It’s the inputs they receive from you and others that will determine which path they travel. Ruiz says that all children are born perfectly…

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A Call for Less Perfection-Seeking in Peaceful Parenting

A conversation in our Reboot Your Kids Facebook Group inspired me to write this article. A scenario was brought up regarding a toddler screaming in a parent’s face and how to handle the situation. My stated philosophy is to use the simplest tactics at your disposal first and then escalate your response and behavior if necessary. In…

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